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Finding God in the Story of Your Life

Baptists and women, part 2

If a man beats his wife, does she still have to stay and submit? Rick Warren’s Southern Baptist church has been accused of saying yes.
For the record, I contacted Saddleback, and they said they would never tell a woman to stay in an abusive relationship, but they would not comment on any specific situation, because of privacy for those involved.

And yet, a woman who attended Saddleback says that she was told to stop gossiping about her marriage when she tried to tell a staff member that her husband had hit her. Read the story here. I heard about this through the MomLogic website, where you can read some very interesting comments from women who’ve been through similar situations. &You have to join momlogic to comment, but it’s a great site with lots of stuff for moms. My friend Suzie Eller runs the Christian mom page there.

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We had quite the conversation on Facebook about my last blog post (thanks to the wonders of technology, this blog shows up as a note on my FB page) about Jimmy Carter’s critique of the Southern Baptist convention and it’s views on women.
I understand complementarian viewpoint. But so often, churches ignore the second half of the verse that tells women to submit. which says, husbands love your wives, as Christ loved the church. Did Christ ever hit the church? Shame the church? Abuse it? No.

If you are being abused, I believe you should leave the marriage. If your church counsels you to stay, I think you should leave the marriage and your church. I’m a Christian but I don’t agree with churhes that counsel women to stay in abusives situations. There are plenty of Christian churches out there that are sane, that counsel victims of abuse to leave, and offer them help in finding protection.

Your thoughts?

2 Comments

  1. I found your blog today by way of Zondervan’s Book Club. They are featuring your book, Simple Compassion, this week. Several things you said in the first day of reading echoed my journey with the Lord, so I went to your website and on to your blog.

    Reading this blog entry, I have to say Amen and Amen! I believe the church has done a lot of damage to women with the message of “stay at all costs.”

    Thank you for sharing this important word!

  2. What you have written about women living in an abusive environment and the divine counsel to sumit has been an eye-opener for me. My only daughter has been living for the past nine years in such an environment, but she has been hesitant to break away due to the missconceptin of submission, nor have I been able to guide her decisively on this matter. Now I see clearly that submission has any meaning only in an environment of love as exemplified by Christ’s love for the Church. I request your prayers and the prayers of anyone who reads this that my daughter may be delivered out of the unbearabe situation she finds herself in.

Share your thoughts. Please stay on topic and polite!

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