How do you live a compassionate life, when your life is already full? How do you engage in God’s work when you are overwhelmed by your own work?

Yesterday was a typically busy day. I was up at 6:30 to see my kids off to school. I spent a little time praying but also preparing for the Bible study I have to lead this morning. I played tennis from 8 to 9, showered and went to work (I’ve taken a part-time job to help pay the bills). I left work at 2, and came home to do my other job of writing and marketing my books for an hour before the kids came home. I took them to the orthodontist, ran over to the grocery store while they were there. When we got home I made dinner, talked with the kids, made sure homework was done, and so on. The three of us gathered around the table to enjoy conversation and dinner together (my husband didn’t get home from work until 9:30 or so). It was actually a quiet afternoon because neither child had a practice I had to drive them to. Many nights, I spend another hour in the car somewhere around dinner time.

My life may seem calm compared to yours. I have a flexible job, right now only one of my kids is participating in one sport. Last week I talked to a friend who has four kids. She’s limited them to one sport each, but because her two oldest are in travel soccer, they have games all over the Chicago area, which means they could (and did) have games at the same time in towns approximately two hours drive apart. I have another friend who has five kids (all in sports) and works full-time. Life gets crazy.

Whether you have one child or five, whether your work is in the corporate world or in your own kitchen, life is hectic, and full. How do you fit it all in? Last weekend, our pastor used a visually compelling demonstration for his sermon on the pace of our lives. He had two vases, the first filled more than half way with sand—which represents all the little details of our life (making dinner, driving to the orthodontist, etc). He then tried to fit several large stones (representing the big priorities in our life, like our relationship with God, caring for ourselves physically, our marriages and kids, and so on) into the vase, but they wouldn’t fit because of the sand. He then took an empty vase, and slowly put the large stones in first, naming the priorities they represented. He then poured the fine sand over the rocks in the vase, and amazingly, it slid around the rocks and filled in the spaces between them, and all the sand and rocks fit into the vase. When we put first things first, the other things in life fit.

I’ve seen this illustration used before, it’s not original with my pastor. I’ve actually used it myself when teaching. But it touched my heart this week.

My question is—what are your big rocks? This is a question to consider prayerfully. One of my big rocks is living out my faith—not just having a daily quiet time, but acting in compassionate and loving ways. Over and over, the Bible talks about God’s heart of compassion, especially for the poor. How do I fit this priority into my busy life, where I work two part-time jobs and have two kids?

I think living your faith by caring for others—whether that’s serving the poor, being kind to the people in your office or cul de sac, being generous—that’s a rock. It’s not an add-on to the Christian life, according to Jesus, who said the two biggest rocks are love God, and love others. But compassion should also be a part of the sand, the minutia of our daily lives. God calls me to be compassionate in my interactions with strangers I meet in my daily round, with my family, my co-workers, and with the poor. I believe he asks us to see the things we do like cooking meals or talking to our neighbors as things we are doing for him. Whether we give a cup of cold water or a casserole, we need to do it in his name.

We can’t fit an unlimited number of “priority” rocks into the vase of our lives. We have to choose. Often, our lives become too full when we have said yes far too often, and far too mindlessly. When we keep saying yes, without considering what God would have us to say that precious word to, we lose sight of our true priority, which is to, as Jesus taught us to pray, do the will of God and bring the kingdom of heaven to earth.

A life of simple compassion begins, of course, with that word: simple. When we simplify, when we put first things first, we have the capacity to be compassionate. And that increases our capacity for growth.

                   ~Henry David Thoreau

“The truth is that the term spiritual life is simply a way of referring to one’s life—every moment and facet of it—from God’s perspective. Another way of saying it is this: God is not interested in your ‘spiritual life.’ God is just interested in your life. He intends to redeem it.”

                    ~John Ortberg, The Life You’ve Always Wanted

What are the “big rocks” in your life—your highest priorities? What would others say they are if they looked at your calendar or your checkbook? If they asked your family, co-workers or friends? Do you put those big rocks into your schedule first?